To Love a Teacher

This past Wednesday evening JB was trying to thread a long piece of yarn string through an empty ribbon spool but the yarn was getting jammed in the spool and wouldn't not come out the hole on the other side. It wasn't a big spool. Probably only about 3 or 4 inches.

I watched him for a little bit and finally asked if he needed some help.

He sighed and told me how he had the yarn through before but couldn't get it back through. He brought it to me defeated. I tried and failed. I picked up a pencil and wound the yarn around a couple of times and we stuck the pencil through and voila! We had yarn threaded through a spool.

I fished for the compliment. A nugget of thanks. "Who's the smartest mom in the whole wide world?"

And wouldn't you know that little stinker thought about it! He hemmed. He hawed. Then he said this:

"Well, not the mom in front of me. Hmmm... I know. Mrs. Bingham! She's a
mom and a teacher."

What a brat!

I promptly got on email and sent this email"

And this was her response:

Well, I'm glad I made her day. You know, she is a pretty smart mom. And, I know she's a great teacher. If I could only convince her to move up to the 5th grade to have both boys in her class again. (They both had her for the 2nd grade.)

She keeps telling me something about 5th graders smelling. Pfft! Like they didn't smell in the second grade!

Just Drop Us Off

Me: Look at all the cars! Everyone is walking their kids in. I better walk y'all in.

Them: No, mom. Just drop us off.

Me: Are you sure? I feel bad.

Them: We're sure, mom. Just drop us off.

Me: But I feel like such a bad mom. Everyone else is walking their kids in.

Them: We'll be fine, mom. Just drop us off.

Me: Are you sure? You know where you're going? I don't want you to feel like I don't love you because I didn't walk you in and take your picture with your teacher at your desk on your first day of 3rd and 4th grade.

Them: We're sure, mom. We know where our classes are and you took our picture at home. Just drop us off.

Me: But LOOK at all these parents. I should walk you in.

Them: Just drop us off, mom.

Me: Okay, but I better still get the Mom of the Year Award.

Them: You got it mom. Stop the car.

Me: Okay. Have a good day! I love you. Talk when you're supposed to talk, and listen when you're supposed to listen. Go learn something!

Them: (DOOR SLAM)

Me: They don't know how lucky they are that I'm willing to just drop them off.

Hair Trends

The boys and I were discussing the fact that we feel JB has started quite the trend though we know he's not the first to ever have a mohawk.

Last summer he was the only boy for miles that had a mohawk.

Later that fall our friend Jestin was allowed to have his hair cut into a mohawk for the homecoming football game. Color and all.

This summer JB once again got his mohawk.

And so did several other little boys.

I told JB he wasn't original anymore.

"What's another cool haircut?"

"Hmm... I don't know."

I could go bald.






Might not be a great idea for the summer. You might get sunburned. And, when you get older and go bald you'll be mad you were bald all those years you had hair.

OH! I could grow an afro! Those are cool!

You can't grow an afro! You're not African!

Well, Drew does have a point.

I Guess I Was Big Trouble

Y'all want to see baby Cate?

You already showed us a picture of Cate.

But you didn't see a picture of me holding Cate.

See.

(Cutest, sweetest, cuddliest baby ever.)

Yeah.

I'm going to adopt her.

See she's so sweet.

You said you didn't

want another kid.

You can't do that.

Yes I can.

Nu-uh.

Is it a girl?

Yes.

That's going to be big

trouble when she gets

older!

And there you have it.

All girls are big trouble!

Everyone & Their Dog

Where's my cup?

I put it in the dishwasher. Get a new one.

I'll just use this one. It's not dirty.

No. Get a new one.

What? These soccer cups aren't dirty.

Yes they are.

Everyone and their dog has touched them.

Who's dog?

Everyone's dog.

What?

What dog?

What are you talking about?

Everyone has touched those cups.

AND, everyone's dog has also touched those cups.

Everyone and their dog.

I don't get it.

It's a saying.

Well, it's a stupid saying.

Yeah.

This is has been a sample of an actual conversation in our home.
Thank you and your dog for tuning in.

It's a hard life.

Why do I have to
have such a hard life?

What are you

talking about?

Everyone is always
bossing me around.
You,
Drew,
Daddy,
Matthew.

Everyone!

And one day

you'll have a wife.
Get used to it kid.

Psst... Hi Karyn!

Hey, it's Drew & JB. Remember us? We live here.


JB, doesn't it suck that mom is writing more about her friends blog and crap than about us?

Yeah!

What's up with that sh*t?

Drew, watch your mouth!

Shut up! You're not my mom.

No, I'm not your mom. She isn't writing about us anymore. Remember?

Yeah, you're right. Sorry. Maybe if I could swim like Michael Phelps and set out to win 9 gold medals, she'll start writing about us again.

Yeah, and I'll be the king of England.

You can do it!

Go for it, Drew!

I should!

But, I'm going to be the King of England.

He is.

We'll see.

Don't eat me.

Steak sounds good.

Oh sh*t!

Hey Sexy!

Hey Sexy!

No, not you. You're not my type. Karyn can have you.

I'll take him.

You're married.

So. Busted.

Listen boys, I'll still write about you.

Promise?

Of course.

Okay.

Let's go out for hamburgers.

My favorite.

I'll have lamb chops.

Oh sh*t!

Watch your mouth!

The End.

If you think that was funny, you should check out Karyn's original post.

No animal or child actually swore in the making of this blog post but we did have hamburgers for dinner.